Hello again....

Well, here is my report - the one that won't go to Australian Sailing, the one that won't chronicle performance and results.  But it will hopefully record some of the things that made up the fabric of the titles - the week that was at Manning Point.  I promise there won't be too many weather and wind references (maybe)....  By the way, if you have some funny stories to share from the titles, add a comment or email me.  I'm sure we will all like to hear them.

So, here we go:

"Gone crabbing...."

Of the top 6 finishers in the series, I know 5 of us (excluding the winners) somehow found a way to ground ourselves in the river along that western shore, sometimes on more than one occasion each.  And it wasn't just the front-runners.  Yes, we were all trying to extract some sort of advantage at the time, to our peril.  This is particularly amusing when you realise that young Greg on Final Phase had been practising on those waters over the past few months, but also Rohan from Water Rat spent some time the previous week taking depth soundings from his tinnie along that shore!  Obviously the sands below the surface were shifting!  I am embarrassed to say that the loudest reaction to hitting the dreaded bottom came from the crew of Foxee, with for'ardhand using the word "stupid" quite forcefully in the direction of the skipper, and the skipper's retort was something like "shut up and focus on getting the boat going!!"  It's okay, we're still talking to each other, but I believe karma did work when said for'ardhand dislocated a finger in the second-last race (I would like to say it was the finger he was wagging at me as we grounded, but that is taking a little too much journalistic licence - sorry Phil, I feel your pain....).

Of course, the sense of humour of fellow competitors comes to the fore in these situations.  It's just that you don't expect such witty and cheeky retorts from a 14-year-old.  After Final Phase's unfortunate scrapings with the river bottom in the first couple of days, young Ben "Famous" Ferguson wandered up to us after the race when we had a our turn to embarrass ourselves later in the series, brandishing his finger and lecturing us that we had no right to try and go over that part of the river and steal the crab pots they had carefully laid there a couple of days earlier!!  Very good, Ben.

A "Celebrity" in our Midst

Speaking of Ben "Famous" Ferguson, apparently he had gained some notoriety in the weeks leading up to the titles, getting his face on TV and local press with sailing.  This led his family and other locals to tag him as "Famous".  We got some taste of the Ferguson family sense of humour during our time at Manning Point, and they were never going to allow their famous son to get too big a head.  The opportunity came to bring him down to earth after Final Phase's unfortunate mishaps in the first two days, when the family greeted Ben as he returned to shore with his new nickname:  "Not So...." (famous).  Love it!

Time 'n Tide

Well, for many of us, grappling with significant tidal flow was a new experience which yielded some fresh new challenges:

• The Heat 2 General Recall-fest.  Is it a record to have 4 starts and 3 general recalls?  I have never experienced that before.  Some of us wondered if the black flags might be hoisted, but one of the officials was heard to say that "We'll keep doing this until these guys learn to get it right!"  Fair enough.
• Special finishing technique.  Honourable mention goes to Gary Reeves in Xanadu, who lost a couple of places in one of the early heats with a strong outgoing tide, by misjudging a finish close to the pin.  Oops!  Too close!  However, the trophy in a unanimous verdict goes to my close friends, the Mortons who, in the same race, were finishing well up in the fleet, but turned a Top 10 finish into 21st, as they took approx. 6 minutes to actually clear the pin and finish cleanly!  The fact that neither Rob nor Sian did not land on shore and promptly beat their heads against a nearby tree, or kick any local stray dogs, is a testament to.....something!
• And of course, who could forget the last race, when everything was up for grabs.  The first nor-easter with a bit of punch, then the clouds closed in and the wind died, and the cats and dogs started to fall out of the sky.  We were under starter's orders, and I know in our case we sat on the line facing upstream, moving inexorably backwards to the wrong side, desperately checking the stop watch and realising we were stuffed!  Fortunately we had plenty of company, sufficient to justify a general recall.  We just needed to endure the downpour for 15 minutes or so before a restart.  Ah, good times.

"Who?  Me?"

Kerry Beatty, we like you.  You're a good guy.  And I was sad to hear about the mishap with your mainsail in the last race.  However, I do need to single you out for special mention in the false start stakes.  In that fateful Heat 2, and again in Heat 7, we found Kerry in our vicinity near the starting line, he and his crew counting down the seconds to the start.  They had their plan, they were positioned for real advantage compared to the fleet when the horn sounded.  The only problem was, the advantage was gained by being a number of boat lengths over the line at the start!  The tide had played its nasty tricks again.

On each occasion when the individual recall horn was sounded, I helpfully called to Kerry, suggesting he might want to consider returning to the correct side of the starting line and having another go.  I don't think he was prepared to accept my interpretation of where the starting line was.  Unfortunately for him, my interpretation was correct enough and the offical pin boat did single him out for special attention.

Crash! Bang! Wallop!

MG's acting like Dodgem Cars?  Yep!  You bet!  Once again, the eventful Heat 2 false starts had everyone on their toes, and the line was set uncomfortably close to the Harrington Pub shoreline.  Disaster in the making.  We had our own mishap when the race finally started, as we started towards the pin end and headed on the short tack for the pub shore.  First obstacle was the "Port Tack Bandit" (more of him later), who seemed intent on a suicide mission all afternoon.  Then we gave water to Carbon Neutral as he tacked to port on our bow, then we tacked as close to shore as possible, looked ahead, almost smugly, thinking we had virtually the whole fleet covered.  Smug too soon, as Awesome steamed down on starboard and, with no real water to tack back into, we had to duck.  Only problem:  a couple of the Taree boys had already decided to do a siamese twin impersonation directly behind Awesome.  Dave Hardaker in his new Aero 12, Wineot, was demonstrating the greater strength of his carbon pole, compared to the flimsy construction in the foam sandwich and fibreglass on Viper's starboard side.  We had nowhere to go but to create a Viper sandwich, slamming into their stalled and rapidly mangling hull, taking out a piece of our bow in the process.

In the same series of events, the Slee family in Asif decided to question the starters at close range, which involved connecting with the start boat, and there was generally the sound of cracking and crumpling among boats in the first minute or so.

One of the more interesting sights was one boat deciding to play chicken on port tack along the pub shore, wilfully ignoring the calls of "Starboard" as they steamed forward.  It wasn't the "Port Tack Bandit", but perhaps he should also have had a similar name!

On the last day, unfortunately, the carnage continued with Flame Boy and Sea Change coming to grief, holing the latter boat and forcing them to retire, with Flame Boy in sympathy deciding not to continue as well.  Also, Blew True had its main ripped whilst capsized, due to the unintentional close attention of Water Rat.  Sad, but it is part of racing from time to time.

Then, of course there was the hitting of marks by various boats during the series, not just at the finish line.  I won't comment on all the incidents I observed, but I will mention my own stupidity.  In one of the races mid-series, we were pushing downwind to the mark near the pub in fluky conditions.  We trailed Filthy Fase and Wizard of Oz, and we caught a beautiful gust which brought us up on their tails.  I hated the idea of rounding the mark and sitting in their exhaust, so I made one of those snap monumentally stupid decisions which not only stopped our momentum, but lost us significant ground and further places which we never regained.  I called "Mark Room".  I positioned myself inside the two boats at speed, but I was well within the 3 boat-length requirement and therefore not entitled to call it.  Would they acquiesce to my bluff?  Rob looked at me and said something like "No you don't!"  Okay, now I was stuffed.  My only option was to slam into the buoy, sit there while the tide kept pushing me onto it, then drag myself off, take the penalty, and watch Gary Reeves in Xanadu turn a deficit behind us into a neat advantage ##**??  Phil's look of disdain at me was certainly justified!!

Final mention and commiseration in the carnage stakes should go to Dave Hardaker, whose brand new Aero 12 incurred structural damage in the mast support, forcing him to retire about halfway through the series.  This was a real shame for the guy who had played the central role on behalf of Taree club to organise the series.  All I can say, Dave, is that you are a great sport, particularly because you still kept a smile on your dial and continued to make things happen for the remainder of the programme.  I hope the boat is back in shape real soon, and that the boat builder has been whipped appropriately!

And now, to the "Port Tack Bandit"

That would be Rory Pryor in Felix.  I couldn't believe my eyes in the first attempted start in Heat 2, with plenty of boats milling at the pin end, Rory scrapes the pin with a port tack start!  He actually somehow dodged everyone.  The confidence and folly of youth!!  The fact he tried it again when we finally got off the line was an absolute head-shaker!!  Rory, you are a scary young dude!  I hope your young female crew did not understand the risk of what you were trying to do, or she may have needed to be taking Mogadon at an unreasonably young age!

The Dept. of Youth

Well, our winners were young, but Hugh was a seasoned veteran compared to a number of our young up-and-coming competitors at the titles.  It was great to see the young guys from Yeppoon in Voodoo show their skills again this year.  The conditions did not suit them, but they often found themselves near the front-runners, and I hope you keep making the trip down here, guys.  You will get good conditions, and you will get higher up the leader board.  Overall, whilst our youngest competitor, Eamon Smith, was only 8 years old, the Balmoral club made the greatest youth contribution.  Whether it was Lachlan Pryor and his crew as "Young Guns" again this season, the Marsden-Jones girls featuring towards the front in a few races, with big smiles and some screaming from the boat and their on-shore supporters, the "Port Tack Bandit", and the quiet achievers on Supernova, it added so much to see all you guys involved and competitive.  We want to see you guys continuing to develop and featuring on the leader board in coming seasons!

"I'll Have a Chai Latte"

This would have to be a Balmoral story.  Sorry guys, you all sail around a beautiful part of Sydney, but there is a certain perception of the people around the lower North Shore, which was certainly reinforced at Manning Point.  No names will be mentioned to protect..... The scene:  crews unrigging at the end of one of the heats.  Father of a teenage female for'ardhand strolls up to the middle-aged skipper from Balmoral Club.  "I feel like a flat white, what about you ****, would you like something?"  "Oh yes, I would like a cappuccino."  Teenage daughter chimes in:  "And Dad, can you get me a chai latte?"  A chai latte????  At Manning Point for heaven's sake!!!!  I wonder how the general store handled that order!

Good Sports

There were several obvious examples of this during the series.  I will highlight a few of which I am aware:

• Martin Pryor.  He is certainly putting a lot into participation in the class by younger competitors.  So much so that he actually volunteered (he says when he had a couple too many beers) to skipper a boat for the sake of giving his young crew the chance to sail.  For a guy who has been out of dinghies for a long time, has some health issues, and wasn't exactly ideal weight for the boat, I applaud you for having the commitment and guts to sail the series.
• Gary Reeves.  I'm not going to dwell on the issues around the abandonment of Heat 1.  Suffice to say, Gary probably had the most to lose from having his first place in that heat cancelled.  However, in his capacity as Class President and as a  competitor, he scrupulously avoided involvement in the issue and readily accepted the decision of the protest committee, carried on sailing and gained a creditable third place overall.
• Hugh Tait.  In the weather melee that was the final heat, Carbon Neutral and Filthy Fase fought out the lead, daylight ahead of the rest of the fleet.  However, as they completed the first lap of the course, Hugh did not round the bottom mark, because he believed the start boat had signalled Course 2, and he viewed Course 2 as not including that mark.  However, he did not know that the sailing instructions had been changed (and that the course 2 flag had been flown at one point on the starter boat because the starters decided to use it to test wind direction!).  Anyway, when he returned to shore, he readily accepted the situation and withdrew from the race, handing the win to Bob and Hayden on Filthy Fase.
• Brian and Lara Mansfield.  They had the crash with Sea Change in the last race.  Lara got a fat lip when the impact threw her face first into the side stay.  But they decided to withdraw from the race because they felt it was not proper to continue after the collision, and the effect it had on Sea Change.
• Greg Roche, Rohan Nosworthy.  I owe a lot of what I know about tuning and sailing an MG to Greg.  He is always generous with his views and time.  The same with Rohan.  He is always offering ideas and prepared to share tips with others.  Maybe I shouldn't single them out, because I'm sure there are others who do the same thing.  It's just great to see this attitude among the front-runners:  champion sailors and champion people.
• Greg and Emily Junk, Sea Change.  In the lighter breezes towards the end of the series, these guys were closer to us than we liked.  In one race, we were drifting downwind towards Harrington Pub, watching as Greg and Emily came up from well behind to sit on our tail.  I was very frustrated and perplexed as to how they did this.  Greg said "Did you realise that you have been sailing with your mainsail inside out for the past few minutes?"  Yes, I am an idiot, and yes, Phil gave me another one of those looks, but I do appreciate the fact that Greg did inform me about the problem when he didn't have to!
• The Taree officials.  Yep, the patience of Job and friendly smiles, despite the challenges and complaints thrown at them!

And "See Ya Later"

To the boys on Carbon Neutral and Water Rat, you were in a class of your own.  Well done. 

I could add lots more, but lack of time and tiredness have hit me.  I could talk about me thinking that the only way I could beat Filthy Fase in Heat 6 was if they capsized, and seconds later they promptly obliged with a spactacular dunking!  I could talk about the Taree wives who adopted us when we felt left out, as they cheered the locals, so they then agreed to cheer us at every opportunity out on the water and approach to the finish for the rest of the series!  I could talk about the Toronto darts championship, which was a subsidiary event to the National Titles, in which I amused my colleagues with a complete lack of talent!

Thank you all for a great time and great memories.  I look forward to many more opportunities to sail and have fun together!!

Cheers John